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HAVE YOU FIGURE YOURSELF OUT?

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I have to figure myself out 这句话是今年我重复想的最多的一句话。很多人在面临爱情与婚姻的时候,特别是从爱情到婚姻的这一刻,双方都会突然就像打了一个激泠想到,我是否想清楚了。这句话并不是我想到的,而是与我开始策划未来的一位亲密的男士提出来的,然后我困惑和伤感了很久。为什么用“策划”这个词,因为从头至尾,我们的恋爱步骤就像是一个作品的计划过程,一切都是在不断地在条件高配的基础之上,双方在观念上的层层咬合上,过关斩将一路过来。突然在面临这段感情即将质变的情境下,对方说I have to figure myself out ! 英文不是我的母语,这句话也不是我们的十几年的英语教育里会经常说到的,中西方的婚恋观也是我一直探讨的一个话题。因此我为这个暧昧的句子,翻看了很多相关的解释与视频后,总结出来,哦,原来就是NO。他说人生不是需要策划的,不需要PROPOSAL。

 

不管这个故事的结局是什么,但在这外过程中,我查找这个句子的几百上千条网友的回答让我印象深刻 ,再次体会到了学习英语真的要从生活情感语境去入手啊,虽然这个情感代价真是巨大的。因为这个句子的暖昧语境 ,我联想到了这段时间不同年龄段的少女们围绕着爱情婚姻这个主题的对话,不管初衷与发展是不是按我们的目的或梦想来的,但大家会在一次又一次的对生活的妥协中问自己,我有没有搞明白我到底要什么,我在做什么。

 

因此在这里,我的作品做不出任何解释 ,因为可能至始至终都没有解释 。我们也不会因此去抱怨或者去指责任何在这条路上后悔或迟疑的人们。我设计了一个纯白的房间,纯白如处子,中间安放了一张看似温暖美好的温床。这张床会用纸来进行床上用品的装饰 ,我并且会邀请年轻的对婚姻有着无限向往的妹子们来帮我搭建这张床,用她们的视觉来设计与营造整体浪漫而感动自己的气氛。我们会在这张床完成的那天,邀请经历过婚姻与正在进入婚姻的朋友们,开始在这张洁白的床上用马克笔进行门口这个问题的回答。相信这张床上会留下的,可能会有幸福,可能会有抱怨,也可能会有疑惑或愤怒,但我们在这个回答问题的过程中,本身就会代入思考,have you figure yourself out ?  这也许是一个人生问卷,如普鲁斯特问卷一样并不是一个此时此刻能够回答清楚的问题,但此刻,你想好了吗?来,让我们拭目以待。

Wuhan, CHINA - Li Wan is a visual artist in Wuhan who had an interactive art exhibit that had to close due to the outbreak of Coronavirus. A lot of us single folks are doing a lot of thinking about relationships and break-ups these days, so this work particularly stands out!

 

From the artist’s submission: I am a public artist and sculptor from Wuhan , the specific outbreak center in China . We already suffered from the Coronavirus  more than two months and experienced  much horror from the epidemic ,and it’s still on . The lockdown in my city have been last more than 60 days , many exhibition have to be closed before the proposal time . My artworks were expected to shown in a gallery till March but unfortunately closed in early January .

This piece is a public art work with interactive participation. I experienced an emotional blow last year and spent three full months immersed in the grief of a breakup for no reason. Many friends have provided me with a lot of psychological counseling during these three months, and they have also raised questions about marriage life or the coming marriage life . So I made a double bed out of paper here and made it look like a wedding bed. Then I asked a question: Have you figure yourself out? And invite everyone around this theme to write their opinions or express something in this wedding bed .

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